Sylvester Stallone and
Jason Statham

The Expendables Poster
 

The Expendables in Action
 

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Old School Action Guys are New School Again!

Is there a reason anyone would want to see a throw back 80s action/combat film? For starters, the cast; Sly Stallone, Mickey Rourke, Jet Li, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Bruce Willis and the Crank film guy, Jason Statham, are reason enough. Shocking, but true they are all in this one film. Nostalgia got the better of me, as each time one of these guys appeared onscreen so many memories of their individual films began to overload my brain circuits. Beginning with (Rocky 1976) Stallone’s fairytale Hollywood script and acting debut that won 3 Academy Awards to one of my favorite films of the, now, Governor of California; (Terminator 2: Judgment Day 1991) that earned 4 Oscars. Mickey Rourke’s comeback film, The Wrestler and Bruce Willis’s (Die Hard 1988) also flashed almost as a pulsating strobe light. Surprisingly, Jet Li was my favorite of all of the actors in The Expendables as I thoroughly enjoyed his likable personality and hand-to-hand combat scenes. Yes, if action films are your thing then just sit back and enjoy the ride down memory lane as there is no way this film would be as effective without the main players, all of whom have left their imprint on Hollywood action films.

Six motorcycles with deafening mufflers come into focus racing towards the end of a street on a moonlit night. Then, we view six burly guys with a skull and cross bone logo with the name “Expendables” written beneath displayed as tattoos or on the backs of black leather jackets. From this dramatic entrance, we know we are in for a wild ride…so begins the action film directed and co-written by Sly Stallone.

Next scene is a tanker ship in the Gulf off the coast of Somalia. Modern-day bad guy pirates have held prisoners captive for over 3 months. Enter the Expendables special ops guys to the rescue for a gun slinging, knife yielding, almost video game action sequences to secure the situation (I’m telling you, if I were in trouble I’d call these guys any day)! They have bigger knives, faster moves, kung fu skills, rope tricks, huge guns and they joke around while rescuing.

After all this action, the crew is ready for some relaxing time. And where do they go? Enter Tool’s Tattoo parlor where a long gray-hair highlighted Mickey Rourke will pen just about anything you can dream up. The partying starts with Credence Clearwater Rival blaring in the background as these adult juveniles play a friendly game of darts where knives are thrown as the darts. Yes, it’s all in a days work and these beer drinking, cigar smoking guys are actually hysterical to watch.

Enter Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger in the next scene and you’re hooked into 2 hours of grown men acting as tough guys that are so laughable they’re entertaining.

The remainder of the storyline deals with a bad dude and his army who over took an island, its general and began killing loads of random people for no reason. The Expendables quickly jump into action and before you can blink. Sly has that sneer on his face that won’t go away until he’s finished tracking down all of the bad guys. It’s the sneer we’ve seen in so many of his films but that’s okay, as that’s what I expect and Sly does it so well. After a roaring fire has destroyed most of the bad guy’s equipment we hear Sly say, “Fry and die!” Do not, I repeat, do not go to this film looking for a good script.

Later, Mickey Rourke has some poignant scenes as Jet Li has some funny scenes. The film is violent and shows water boarding of a beautiful girl, which is in bad taste, but in the Rambo movies the torture scenes were out-of-control-weird so I was expecting some. Stallone does risk his life to save the girl and I paused and thought okay, that’s nice.

Most of this review is overwhelmingly sarcastic so please take note of that. I happen to be a film reviewer who remembers sitting in the Oakbrook Theater in 1977 while being blown away by Rocky. Yes, times have changed but mostly the story remains the same. The famous shouting of Rocky’s girlfriend’s name after he wins his fight, but can’t see as his eyes are swollen shut still haunts me to this day. Is there such a scene here? Well, yes and no. Adrienne’s name is not shouted at any time but Sly does have a sweet scene with a Brazilian actress named Giselle Itié and her character’s name is Sandra.

Bottom-line: Entertaining if you like action films and particularly if you are a fan of any of these leading actors. The music was fantastic and set the tone for a wild, action-filled ride.

Sarah Adamson © August 19, 2010